Mr. Dr. Professor Lord Matthew Huffman
From the archives of TiPWiki, the unofficial Duke TIP Wiki
Mr. Dr. Professor Lord Matthew Huffman Esquire III was the TA for Nuclear Science at Duke West Term 1. He is a very sad man, but a god all the same. His jokes made in his monotone voice are the epitome of comedy. Some of his best quotes are the following:
- "Hi, I'm your TA, Matthew. You can't hate me more than I hate myself."
- "Trey don't focus on your paper too much, it might think you're too clingy"
- "This is going to be a dry topic because I'm a dry person"
- "The only creative messes I can think of are all my highschool relationships"
- "Can I teach you a life lesson? It's not about how thicc the topsoil is, it's about the GIRTH"
- "We will not stand for more fun than a 3/10 at this camp"
- "I could win an easy Nobel like the peace prize"
- "Fluorine just really wants to get with everything, just like my ex"
- "I don't play fortnite. I have dignity"
- *to roshen, who was to leave during dinner* ”I gave you a hug, and how do you repay me? HOW DO YOU REPAY ME?? BY COMING TO EVENING STUDY!”