Squirrel Drugs

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The theory of how TIPsters at Davidson are not allowed to touch trees.



"I have this theory that all the trees here contain drugs inside them, and thats why they're so big and leafy, like tree steroids. And then the drugs are transmitted through touching the trees. That's why the squirrels here are so crazy- they're high. Don't you ever notice how they bow down to the trees or how they sometimes just sit there staring at them like they worship the trees, and then when they climb it they have this look of pure ecstacy. That's why we're not allowed to touch trees. Because they have drugs in them." Once, Maya and Naomi saw two squirrels running after each other. They thought it was because one stole the other guys drugs from the tree.

Also, that's why the third floor smells bad. Because people cut off tree branches and smoke them in their rooms.

There's even the weed tree! On this tree, all of the leaves look like mini marijuana.