Emily Rose
Emily Rose, more commonly known as Rose or Rows, is one of the most amazing TIPsters ever. She attended Davidson '05 where she took Wonderwartz, East '06 where she took Existentialism, East '07 where she took Philosophy: Mind and Meaning, and East '08 where she took Avatar; all during Term One.
She is the wife of Cara Weisman, and the two consummated their marriage during the last dance of Term 1 2007.
During the summer of '06, the name Emily Rose gained new meaning, forcing and to perform not only one, but two exorcisms on Rose, to oust the demons within her. Unfortunately, an exorcism preformed by an atheist, using a lamppost as a candle and a book stolen from Bucket, with Martini saying "ding" replacing the bell, usually aren't at all very effective. Both exorcisms occurred during dances where Rose, Martini and Adam were generally not dancing with the crowd, whom they labeled as sheep and followers of slave morality (a result of Martini and Rose's Existentialism class). During this year, Rose and Adam discovered that they both were the reincarnation of half of Freud, as each could think of thousands of perverted jokes inspired by any object, animate or not.
During '07, this bond strengthened to the point where Rose and Adam could finish each other's sentences and almost read each other's thoughts. Much to Martini's annoyance, they began to start laughing by just staring at each other without saying a word, since they both knew the joke anyway. After reading Plato's Symposium in class, Adam and Rose realized that they were each other's other half, which would account for much of the thought-reading. This theory also fit in quite well with their past life, wherein each was a half of Sigismund Schlomo Freud. They were thus nicknamed Adomily, and were relatively inseparable.
Rose has been known to join in Couch Piling parties, which often involved oreos, sugar cubes, and Fuze. She has also been known for her obsession with Nietzsche, his mustache, and facial hair in general. Her favorite activities include poking and hugging anybody in her path, inducing seizures, and hugging little "e"s. She and Rachel VanDaalen also gave each other smoldering looks, and conspired to steal Mitch's bucket. Rose often shouted phrases such as "Rean!", "Tuberculosis!", "Pyloric sphincter!", and "Bunnies!"
She once owned a green moose, given to her by Rachel. However, it was violently stolen (and assaulted) by Smith Mathieu. Throughout TIP, the moose switched owners many times, often accompanied by shouts of, "I'M SAVING IT FOR MARRIAGE!" There is currently an intense debate about whose moose it actually is. During TIPreunion of Winter '07, Smith and Rose engaged in a brutal tug-of-war with the stretchy moose, resulting in its head being torn off. Rose interred the body in her desk, and Smith kept the head for foul purposes, widely purported to be sexual in nature.
Rose is one of a select group of people who know why artichokes are daunting. As well as this, she, along with Nik Padinha and Cara Weisman, is from ----- Finland. In her fourth year, she and Nik performed a number of escapades with various inanimate objects, including umbrellas, Styrofoam cups, and pizza crusts.
Due to her Freudian influences, Rose sees brooms in a different light than most other people. This has expanded to vacuums, corn, and watermelons. Due to Dylan's odd trysts with inanimate objects, this list has been expanded to include bananas, hairbrushes, and cat toys. As well as this, she made a point of noting that lamps can be painful without lampshades. Usually, at least one of the above-mentioned items is referenced whenever the phrase "brb" is mentioned in an online conversation with her. She also makes frequent, denigrating reference to Carl, who may be best described to the uninitiated as a small, green snake.
One of her life goals includes going into a maternity ward and yelling "PULL!" instead of "PUSH!" This idea was inspired by Noah Levine's statement of "Let's give birth!", yelled out during a couch-piling session. Another life goal is to turn on, tune in, and drop out whilst playing on Boohbah Zone. She wants personally witness Stephen Hawking taking tea (a wish which was inspired by a Cambridge University summer program pamphlet, wherein it was stated that those attending the physics class would drink tea with Hawking). She is also determined to oppress Dylan, eat Martini's gummy heart, watch the lemur rendition of Thus Spake Zarathustra, and be for the benefit of Mr. Kite. She plans to implement the solution to world hunger, and to be killed by Method 4-1-2.
Rose is also well-known for her indomitable abs. These should be considered lethal weapons, as Rose was able to lift Adam into the air during a couchpiling session by their sole use. They were also notorious for crushing the fingers of Walker, who was foolish enough to poke them. A widely-held belief amongst the couchpilers is that there must have been some cosmic mix-up, giving Rose Adam's Godly abs, and giving Adam the sensual curves that should rightly belong to Rose.
She is "mildly" obsessed with the movie Labyrinth, and frequently hugs inanimate objects. She has long been associated with murder and necromancy, beginning in first year, where a proposed term book page for her RC group included the header "Eleven Dead Red Hots and One Red Hot Murderer" (the murderer being Rose). She currently possesses some of Harrison's yarn and Dylan's Oppression Hat (shared with Rachel Vandaalen), both received at the end of her fourth year.